The act of birth is a miracle; a magical event in the life of mum and baby. Sometimes.
At other times, it does not go quite to plan.
It can be scary and traumatic and hard to get over, no matter how much compensation it is to have your baby with you as a result.
If that sounds all too familiar, and you are struggling to come to terms with a traumatic birth, here are a few things that might help:
Step 1: Accept That It Was, Well, Rubbish
First things first—acknowledge it.
Maybe your birth was an epic 48-hour labour saga, or perhaps you felt like an extra in a medical drama, complete with unexpected plot twists.
Whatever happened, it’s okay to admit it was not what you’d hoped for.
Shout it out loud (preferably not in the middle of the Tesco checkout line) or write it down.
There’s power in saying, “Yep, that was awful.”
Step 2: Stop Comparing Your Story
Yes, some people have perfect births that belong in a glossy magazine.
But they also have the kind of lives where their babies never spit up and their hair always looks amazing. Spoiler: they’re lying.
Comparing your birth story to someone else’s highlight reel is a fast track to misery.
Embrace your messy, real, and totally valid experience—it’s yours, after all.
Step 3: Find Your People
You need a squad, whether that’s your mum mates, a support group, or just someone who won’t flinch when you describe your stitches in graphic detail.
Connecting with others who get it can be a lifeline. Bonus points if they bring snacks.
Step 4: Unleash the Power of Therapy
Let’s face it, therapy is the Beyoncé of post-birth recovery tools: iconic, powerful, and worth every penny.
Talking to a professional can help you make sense of the chaos.
If therapy feels a bit too “serious” right now, journaling is a decent starter pack.
(And no, it doesn’t need to be poetic. A scrawled “WTF just happened?!” totally counts.)
Step 5: Know When to Call in the Big Guns
If your traumatic birth came with physical injuries or medical negligence, it’s time to put on your metaphorical power suit and consult a birth injury solicitor.
They’re like the Avengers of the legal world, helping you fight for compensation and closure.
Because let’s be honest: hospital food is bad enough without leaving with a side of trauma.
Step 6: Laugh (Eventually)
Dark humour can be healing.
Once you’ve got some distance, you might find yourself joking about the time you yelled at a midwife for touching your snacks or how you demanded an epidural like it was an Olympic sport.
Find the funny where you can—it’s good medicine, even if the memories still sting.
Step 7: Celebrate the Small Wins
You survived, and that’s worth celebrating.
Maybe the healing process feels slower than watching paint dry, but every step counts.
Your body is a powerhouse (even if it feels like a slightly broken one right now). Honour it, scars and all.
Your birth may have been traumatic, but you are still here and you can get through this!
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